Ahh, young love. Something so many long for and yet so few actually attain. If you are one of the lucky ones and have found your other half early, like myself, you will soon realize that things are not as simple as they may seem. Not because of your relationship, which is entirely blissful, but because of the stress and negativity from others who simply do not understand. This is an article for everyone who has ever felt judged, embarrassed, or belittled because of their relationship and has had to deal with people constantly saying these snide comments: you are not alone.
You’re too young
Love is not a carnival ride; you do not have to be this old to love this person. Why are we so obsessed with putting an age limit on love? Yes, the older you get the wiser and more financially stable you become (hopefully), but what does that have to do with love? If anything, isn’t young love the most authentic form of love there is because you both are free people who are able to make their own choices and love someone solely for who they are, not what they bring to the table? The bottom line is that you are never too young to be happy, so if your significant other brings you constant joy do not deprive yourself of that simply because of the arrogance of others.
There’s more fish in the sea
When going out for seafood, most people would rather treat themselves to a gourmet piece of fresh lobster than settle for an average plate of fish-and-chips. Why? Because lobsters are a special and delicious treat that will make for a memorable experience, while the fish-and-chips are probably pretty good, but nothing special and incredibly common. Regarding youthful relationships, my point is that while there are plenty of fish in the sea, unfortunately most of the fish are boring, monotonous duds. Sorry, but I don’t want to Netflix and chill. I don’t want to make small talk about your high school lacrosse team at a drunken frat party. I don’t want you to take days to text me back to show that you don’t really care all that much.. I want you to sweep me off my feet and make me remember every moment. I want chivalry, courage, and old-school manners. And I have found that! So while I am sure there are millions of cod fish out there that wouldn’t be all that bad, I’ll stick with my precious lobster and live a life filled with amazement and rarity and melted butter.
Life is too short
Um, exactly! Life is so precious and love is often fleeting, so why spend your limited time with multiple people if you can spend it with one who makes you so, so happy? Life is too fragile to pretend to be someone you’re not. There is nothing wrong with wanting to settle down early and being content with your relationship. When you know, you know. So don’t waste your minutes conforming to the wrong opinions of others or acting nonchalantly when someone puts down your relationship because you’re afraid of being judged or, especially, denying yourself of love if you’re lucky enough to grasp it. Being a college student is stressful enough; we wouldn’t stay in a relationship if it was a waste of our time or created additional stress. Life is too short. Love is rare. If you’ve got it, hold on tight, and appreciate it every single day.
Variety is the spice of life!
This one’s my personal favorite. Who even came up with this ludicrous phrase? I don’t know about you, but I would rather eat Snickers every single day than introduce Starbursts or Skittles into my diet. By now, I know what I like and do not like. There is no right or wrong, it is just a matter of opinion. So why would I waste my time trying out different types of candy only to be disappointed and always end up favoring chocolate? But there is nothing wrong with adoring chocolate. In fact, you can enjoy chocolate in millions of different ways. Chocolate can be enjoyed as wine or as a steak marinade or simply as a Hershey Kiss. So, if your partner is your favorite spice and enhances just about every aspect of your life in new and exciting ways, why would you ever waste your time with anything else? Don’t try to be a cumin girl when deep down you’re paprika. Own it. (Okay, no more food puns, I promise)
But he might not be “the one”
Why are we so obsessed with finding “the one”? What if we can love multiple people throughout our lives in different ways and none of them is more or less valid than the other? I don’t think you ever have this life-affirming realization that “he’s the one,” but rather months turns into years and you find yourself still laughing and smiling and growing and wanting to spend every solitary moment with each other. You two stay together, not because it’s a conscious decision that you ponder everyday, but rather it becomes your instinct. Your DNA starts to intertwine with his and you become one. I don’t think you ever find “the one;” over time you just become one.
You’re missing out on the typical college experience
What even is that?! I am so sick and tired of attempting to compare my life to the “typical college experience” only to realize it is a complete myth. College is different for everyone. It’s where you learn who you are and who you want to become. We forget that it’s a privilege to go to school, not a right of passage. So don’t waste your time trying to fit in when you’re paying thousands of dollars to receive an education and make memories for you, no one else. It’s sad that love, something so special, is so uncommon in college that it alienates those who have found it. But just because not everyone owns a Beyoncé sized diamond ring doesn’t mean she hides it. If you’ve got it, flaunt it! If your friends are true friends, they will love you regardless of how often you go out with them to frat parties (which are a bust nine times out of 10). So if you go out, go out. If you don’t, then don’t. Either way, who even cares? There is no “typical college experience” so love those who deserve to be loved (including yourself!) and follow your own internal compass, it will lead you in the right direction.